A-ttractive  Highly attractive.

 

attractivation  The power of attraction.

 

cutemost  The cutest person in the vicinity.

 

accelerace; acceleracing  Accelerating to beat someone at the traffic lights.

 

acheage  The amount of a body that aches.

 

advertiew  An interview for the sole purpose of marketing a product.

 

afterkisses   Kisses after lovemaking. 

 

agrovacious  Aggressively aggravating.

 

agrovicious  Viciously aggressive.

 

ankle-shankers  Old loose socks that slip down from your ankles.

 

Annimisery  The wedding anniversary of a miserable couple.

 

bedoing  Keeping busy, perhaps just for the sake of it.

 

begrin  Commence smiling broadly.

 

beodorant  Deodorant for B.O.

 

bespotted  Seen by someone who really likes you.

 

Bibliophiliac  A person who incessantly quotes books.

 

Blandleader  A leader with no charisma.

 

bonsigh  A very short audible breath.

 

breakfastation  The observance of breaking a fast.

 

Bum Bowl  Toilet.

 

Bycra   A bicycle rider wearing lycra – particularly one with a propensity for  

               annoying registered road users in motorised vehicles.

 

Cacaphone  A mobile phone on which someone talks loudly in public.

 

cat trick  Three cats in a row.

 

catastrophy (v. catastrophing)  The science of engineering catastrophe.

 

Chiropractress  A pre-feminism Chiropractor.

 

chocolate decision  A decision made under the influence of chocolate.

 

cide  An affectionate term for cider with its refreshing taste.

 

Clitchen  A kitchen with a naked female chef.

 

consension  Consensual coercion; consent given under coercion or situation of  

                         disempowerment.   

 

consideracely

 

coronaphobia  The irrational fear of invisible micro-organisms.

 

cosexual  Anything which can accompany sexual activity,

 

Covidiot  1. A person you wish to demonise or lampoon because they don’t 

                    accept the mainstream pandemic narrative.  2. A person who   

                    unquestioningly accepts the pandemic narrative of politicians and the   

                    media.

 

dearth wish  A desire for less.

 

devasion  Retreat.

 

dislikeness  An amount of dislike.

 

disturbulance Turbulent disturbance.

 

domestic anger  Anger over trivial domestic matters.

 

Dricycle  A bicycle with a canopy for wet weather.

 

droned  Drunk and stoned.

 

droppy Acting like a drop kick.

 

emothional  Poignant emotionality.

 

endangerous; endangerously  An act placing someone else in danger.

 

endarkment Depression.

 

esophagate  To swallow.

 

exmire  Cease to admire someone.

 

exmired  Having lost someone’s admiration.

 

faccident  When incorrect  facts are accidentally spoken or published.

 

fascilate  Fascinate intermittently.

 

Footsyball  Soccer.

 

fuckaceous  Having the quality of being disastrous. 

 

gardened  A garden after a lot of work.

 

God Tribe  Any specific religion.

 

greef   Knowing there will be no more Terry Pratchett novels.

 

hirt  A small amount of pain.

 

Humban  Female homo sapien. (see Womban)

 

honestry  The art of practicing honesty.

 

hurrage  Unproductive hurrying.

 

hystericalectomy  A very amusing hysterectomy.

 

iJect

 

interdigestion  The recovery of the digestive system from excess digestion.

 

interferret  Nosily checking someone else’s belongings.

 

intirenet  The total reach of the world wide web.

 

Jawana    Marihuana as in ‘would you like some?’

 

jit  A small amount

 

‘kyou  abbreviation for thankyou.

 

libido therapy  Sexual pleasure provided by a professional practitioner.

 

libido self-management  Masturbation.

 

lithe-headed  Clear thinking.

 

Marradidge     Good quality marihuana.

 

Mathturbator  Person who does mathematics puzzles just for fun.

 

maxcellent  Massively excellent.

 

Meckiff Syndrome  The behaviour of tossers.

 

mentional  A reaction that is both mental and emotional.

 

Middleage  (middalij) The first stage of not being young.  

 

Monkee  Trainee Monk.

 

movelet

 

nakiddity  Going naked in an inappropriate place.

 

nicety  The practice of being nice to others.

 

noisage  Unnecessary  or invasive noise.

 

nowsome  A moment that feels very here and now.

 

nudatory   Mandatory nudity as at a nudist convention.

 

nudation  Disrobing in company.

 

nudeness  Being nude and rude.  

 

nuding  Going nude, especially in public.

 

obiouda  I’ll be able to.

 

oldage  (oldij) Discomfort in the last stage of not being young. (see Middleage)

 

Onan’s Relief  Male masturbation.

 

onvolved  Involved vicariously.

 

ovenance  The judicious use of ovens.

 

penestrian  Very ordinary rather than inspirational writing.

 

peppercoin  Money used to pay a peppercorn rent.

 

Phonee  A person addicted to their mobile phone.

 

Pig Eye  An eye infection marked by the appearance of a sty.

 

pinting   Enjoying pints of beer.

 

Pistemolgy  The study of the nature, origin and limits of human inebriation. 

 

Peri-surfing (peristaltic-wave-surfing)  Going to the toilet.

 

Peri-board  Toilet.

 

phione

 

plentish  Almost plenty.

 

Plonder  A plodding wander.

 

policement   The process of policing.

 

Pollytician  A politically correct comedian.

 

Portilda  A member of the Australian Women’s Soccer team that lost the 2023   

                   World Cup at home.

 

pourn

 

prostration  Prostate frustration.

 

re-degeneration  Renewing degeneracy.

 

relaxment  Degree of relaxation.

 

Romants  Readers of Romance novels.

 

rushness   Being in a state of haste.

 

scrawn  Being thin and bony.

 

seniorism  Expecting privilege for age.

 

senioritis  Feeling older than you are.

 

sexcuse  A reason for not having sex with a willing partner.

 

sexular  Overt sexual behaviour.

 

skinnynapping  Sleeping naked.

 

skinnytripping  Naked on LSD.

 

slown  Having slowed down.

 

smithered  Blown to smithereens.

 

Smutter One who finds smutty innuendo in nearly everything said.

 

snough   A sneeze supressed into a cough to avoid nasal ejaculation.

 

snowhere  Any place where it snows.

 

socking A fist fight.

 

southern handshake Hand relief.

 

soworrow  The correct pronunciation of sorrow in a pop song.

 

speedering Travelling faster than the speed limit.

 

stumb

 

stunk  Stoned and drunk.

 

swog  A very quick swallow, usually under duress.

 

tald  A tall, bald man, easily spotted in a crowd.

 

Teacherphile  A teacher who sexually transgresses duty of care with a student.

 

thwartled  Thwarted in a surprising manner.

 

toens  Affectionate term for toenails,

 

tolopy

 

traumanation  The traumatising of an entire nation.

 

Tree Air  Air that has been purified by trees.

 

tribing  Socializing with kindred spirits.

 

troge

 

tweezing  Using tweezers.

 

Ubereater  A person who orders a lot of takeaway food deliveries.

 

uncrease  A lack of of increase or decrease.

 

unindated  Outdated.

 

unmire  Cease to admire someone.

 

unmirable  A person who cannot be admired.

 

ute law  The freedom from rules that ute drivers believe they have.

 

vagination v.  vaginating  Female arousal caused by a sexual fantasy.

 

vegetarial

 

wearned 

 

Womban  A female capable of childbirth.

 

Wroter  Writer in past tense.

 

wrove

 

Contributors welcome.

Send contributions to stephen.faulds@bigpond.com with 'Free Range Dictionary' in the subject line.

 

CONTRIBUTORS:

Stephen Faulds (originator) First published 25.7.25